Jesus the Terminator?

With the release of the new Terminator movie, I wanted to re-watch the "older" Terminator movies before checking out "Salvation." After finishing the first installment, "The Terminator," I began "Terminator 2: Judgment Day." I came to the part when Sarah and John Connor with the T101 Terminator arrived at there "camp" where they stocked up on weapons and acquired a truck...and then God touched my heart with a realization.

During this scene Sarah is sitting on the picnic table watching her son, John, and the Terminator (Uncle Bob, haha) interact and play - as John taught "him" how to 'give me five' and various other human interactions. As she watches on she thinks to herself how crazy and incredible it is that this Terminator, the very one that was on a non-stop mission to kill her years ago, is now protecting her son.

She thinks to herself this..."Watching John with the machine, it was suddenly so clear. The Terminator would never stop, it would never leave him, and it would never hurt him or say it was too busy to spend time with him...it would always be there, and it would die to protect him... In an insane world it was the sanest choice."

When I was watching this, something became so clear to me. Clearer than ever before. Jesus will never leave us, He will always be there, and He died protecting us. Protecting us from the bondage of sin. Protecting us from endless death. God sent Him to protect our lives by giving His. Just as the Terminator gave his life to protect John Connor, Jesus gave His to save us...giving us new lives in Him. Jesus is on a non-stop mission of giving His love...making His glory known. In this insane world Jesus IS the sanest choice.

Of course I already knew this truth, but it is amazing how God reminds us and continues to show us His love in awesome and unexpected ways. I really never saw the "machine" from "T2" and "T3" in this light before. But after God revealed His love and mission to me again, this time in an awesome 'blockbuster' way, I am very blessed, and pleased to know, that Jesus...is my very own...Terminator!

Scars, outro

4 months, 2 days.....plenty of time for God to take a broken and scarred heart and give it light again. With a great body of believers and a new place to let God work, I have come to a place that I have long missed - being used by the Lord God. The only obstacle in my way was my way. I was not allowing God to be God...in my life, my situation. I love it when God shows up and crams something in my face. It's so refreshing and encouraging to know that the Mighty Creator cares that much...to just give you a face full of what you needed.

A journey would not be called a "journey" if what happened during the journey was not important. They already have words for that...like ending, or destination. I'm glad this journey has taken place and I believe that I have grown from it. It gives new hope to me for future trials and future darkness, and that is one of the most important things to know - knowing, when the darkness comes, where the light is.

“I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” - Jesus (John 8:12 esv)

Scars, intro

Wow. It's been a while. It seems as if my last few posts were just forced attempts at trying to say something spiritual. The truth is...I was fooling myself into thinking that I was doing myself a favor. I was also fooling myself into thinking that I was fooling God...that was foolish. So I took a long break from blogging after coming to this shameful conclusion. From this post on, I will not force blog, but only say something that is worth saying and something that I feel I need to say. I understand it may not be everyday.

Tonight I do have something that I believe is worth sharing. Something that I believe will help me with my current state of being. This post will be the first in a series of posts that will log my journey from where I am now to where I want to be. And where I am now is a place of hurt, a place of pain, a place of rejection, a place that I have been for a while now. A place of scars, that for almost a year, has not been dealt with, and has not been touched by the healing hand of God. Something has happened to lead me here, though I am the only one to blame for allowing myself to tumble to this place that I am. Something did shove me...but it was me who allowed the momentum to continue, I only needed to put my feet down...and I didn't. I didn't want to. I wanted to be mad. I couldn't stop feeling rejected. But no longer. I don't want to be here anymore. I don't want to hurt anymore. I don't want to have this same feeling of rejection that started some time ago. I want to let go. I want to give it to God. This is the day that I acknowledge my pain, my anger, my abscence from the Word, and God's absence from my heart (that being my doing of course, not Gods.) I miss the light, I miss the joy, and I miss the freedom. I want freedom from this place of grudge-holding and this place of not letting my mind and my heart move on. This will take time, and this will take prayer. ***If you are reading, your prayers are very longed for and appreciated deeply - thank you***

This will start the journey. My wife has been trying to help me through this, yet I have not really let her do so. I have decided that I cannot do it without her (Like I have to decide that!?) So we, as she was affected and deeply hurt as well, will begin this change and this progress together. As so we should. Tonight I have taken my first step out of this hole. Tomorrow I will work on another.
---Coming soon: Scars, outro

Progress

It's never too late for progress. Progress keeps us moving forward and prevents us from being mundane and stagnant. Sharpening ourselves with the Word and by each other will keep us ready for battle with the Enemy. Do not ever think that it is too late for you to better equip yourself for this new life. Use the tools you have and the gifts God has blessed you with to reach those in need of God's saving grace. This is something that is never "too late" to begin.

"Do not neglect your gift, which was given you...Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress. Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers." - 1 Timothy 4:14-16 (NIV)

Motivation and focus will come when you seek Jesus in the morning. He will guide you through the day as you go out for battle - the battle against the Enemy to better ourselves in Christ, and to grow the kingdom of God. It is never too late for progress.

The Future

Marty was a pretty lucky guy. He got to zip to the future and see the woman that he married and his kids all grown up - even the job he had. That must have been nice to have confirmation (or warning ;) of things to come...especially if it were things that we'd be unsure of.

If someone would have told me 8, 10 years ago how my life would be now, I probably would have laughed in their face. I would have definitely thought it cool, but would not believe it nonetheless. It is so amazing how things have turned out; the wonderful, beautiful woman that I married, the adorable and smart kids that we have, and a great journey together that has led to this point. No, we're not wealthy by any means...financially, but we are definitely rich in God's blessings. And He takes care of us everyday and gets us through. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that God is great. He leads us on this path, and though sometimes rough and sometimes hard, He is always there in the end - with something amazing.

Ten years ago I thought I had it all figured out, and I thought that my life would be a certain way and with certain people ten years from then. Thank God that it didn't end up that way. Thank God for guiding me on a path that led to the wonderful "things" that I have now. To Jennifer, to Jaden, to Jacee, to family, to health, to life.

To rely on God and His timing is definitely a hard act, but is so worth it. And to think of the many, many blessings that I have missed out on because I was not 'there' when God had them for me. Though the future is still unclear, relying on God and looking to Him for guidance, is something that I will try and try to not take for granted any longer.
Lord, keep my eyes open!

The Tyranny of Things

Whenever I see a big, nice TV and a blu-ray disc player, a nice truck or house, a new pair of shoes, or anything that I would like to have, I have to be careful with my thoughts. I also have to be careful with my possessions controlling me. I have to be cautious not to put these things first, in front of God. It is so easy for us to focus on all the stuff that we have and all the stuff that we want. It is something that teeters on a dangerous line. And it is a trap easily fallen into - one that I have often been caught in recently.

I am very ashamed that I, as a follower of Christ, have let the things that God created takeover the place of the Creator - that I often let the things that God has created to bless me with, to draw me closer to Him with, and to show His glory with, take the place on His throne in my heart. Don't get me wrong, it is okay to have things, it is even okay to 'want' things, as long as they do not consume our heart - as long as they do not take dwelling in our heart so deep that if when taken away (He gives and takes away) it is so painful like roots being ripped from the ground - as long as it does not devastate us when gone. When God is our focus and when He is at His rightful place on His throne in our hearts, the things that we possess will not come between the Creator and the created.

Let us be thankful for what we have and be cautious of the things that we want. Let us no longer let things take residence in our hearts...on His throne. As for me, I will do my best to take pleasure in what I have that He has blessed me with - my wife, my kids, and my family.

I know that when I put Him first, that when I keep Him above all else, He will bless my life with more "things" than I can imagine.

Christians

I don't understand why Christians tend to bicker and fuss with each other about trivial things. It's just not important to argue little finite details about things that don't have any significance in our purpose. It seems as if we negatively debate with one another more than we do sharing the truth with the lost. This blows my mind. It's very disheartening. I love learning the Word and Truth as much as the next Christian and even enjoy healthy conversations with my friends about the Lord, but to exchange hurtful blows because of disagreement is ridiculous. Disagreement among believers is totally fine and can actually be very constructive, but should not result in assumptions and comments of arrogance. I mean, if a Christian is turned off by another Christian, then what would a non-Christian think? How do they feel? We must stand together with our mandate in mind, with our focus on the higher calling.

As one body we can take the Word to the world much more effectively. Apart, I'm afraid we will fail.